Week 6 Weigh In

So I've just had my week 6 weigh in, although let's be honest, I haven't been sticking to it for 6 weeks.

However, after having the heart to heart with the owner at the gym and doing the hypnosis at night, it looks like something must have clicked because I had a 1.8kg loss this week!! Crazy!!! So I am now sitting at 110kg exactly.

I honestly didn't think that I would have a loss, let alone such a large one!!!

Friday was the worst day last week for eating as I'd had a terrible afternoon which ended in comfort eating.  This along with it being Valentines day meant that it wasn't so great eating wise.

I realised today that I still haven't taken a 'before' photo... I really need to do that!!

Another thing I haven't mentioned yet, and that is that I have signed up to do belly dancing again! My first class is tonight.  I am a little nervous about it all, but it will be good to do it again, I've missed it!

So it's been a couple of weeks...

... and I have fallen off the wagon.

Truth be told, I fell off the wagon in Week 2, but was trying to kid myself that I was doing ok.

The thing is, a friend of mine made a comment to me around this time that I don't believe was intentionally negative, but it got stuck in my head all the same.  Round and round it went, and I basically gave up.

I have been beating myself up mentally for the last couple of weeks, and there has been a block of chocolate... one in 5 weeks. While that is good, it doesn't mean I haven't been eating other chocolate... and that is not so good... in fact, I have eaten quite a lot of chocolate in the last couple of weeks.

I have just been eating what I want, and not following the Curves Complete plan at all. I kept coming up with excuses about it all, but the truth is, I lost faith in myself.

I am still trying to find it.

It is so hard to try and get it all right, I do need a plan, I do need routine and right now I have neither.  I have been trying to get together an idea of what I want to do for my meal plan, and so far it's really half-arsed. I need to commit to it and get it sorted... but I have no motivation.

I had my weigh in this morning at Curves and spent half an hour talking to my coach (today it was the owner), and she got my head straight. But now that I am home, my head is twisted again.  I think my job for this afternoon/tonight is to get my meals planned and watch the videos on the website. Oh and just so you all know, my weight went up... now the heaviest I have been.... 111.2kg! Not cool.

I don't remember how to be patient with all of this... I know I said initally that I don't want to look back, but I do... I miss who I used to be. I miss enjoying healthy eating and I miss enjoying exercise. Right now they both seem so boring and too hard.

Week 2 Weigh In

As I mentioned in my post this morning, Week 2 didn't go so well. But I put my big girl knickers on and went to Curves this morning for my weekly weigh in and workout.

It was really good to sit down with my coach and talk through last week, the highs and the lows.  She was able to give me some suggestions on things to do.

So, as predicted, I did gain... almost everything I lost. So I am currently sitting at 109.5kg, but looking at the positive side, it's still 200g less than my original weight. and I spose a loss is a loss and heading in the right direction.

After my workout I headed to the other side of Canberra for my doctors visit. She is really happy with my progress since I was diagnosed with anxiety and we have decided that I will go back in a couple of months to see how everything is going and to see about the possibility of starting to lower my anti depressant dosage. I don't want to rush it, but I do want to be drug free again.

I also got my grocery shopping done, so hopefully I will be able to stick to the plan this week. I am just about to put the plan on my fridge so that I can see it all the time.

Week 2 in Review... and my Week 1 weigh in

I have been meaning to write this post all week, and maybe if I had the week would have gone better...

Overall it wasn't a bad week, but due to the heat and having a five year old underfoot all week, it really didn't go as planned and I'm pretty sure I will have gained weight this week.

I think it really started after my weigh in last week.  The problem is, my scales are much kinder and I was a little disappointed that my weigh in wasn't as good, especially for a first week weigh in.  In saying that I lost 1.1kg so it's nothing to sneer at, but because I was expecting a 2kg loss, I was disappointed.

I think because of this disappointment I became quite lax in my eating habits, but also in my mindset.  I didn't print out my plan or watch my Curves videos.  Looking back I think having my weekly plan on the fridge makes a big difference as it is a constant reminder.

Foodwise, there was chocolate... not blocks, but there was chocolate... and I found that as soon as I had some, I wanted more each day. Because we were in over 40 degree heat, all I wanted was quick and easy food... which meant we had pizza a couple of times this week too... which definitely didn't help.  Plus there was a date night last night (bowling) where we had hot dogs and chips, so over all I think this week can be counted as a bit of a fail.

I also missed a work out due to a weird work schedule, so I only got 2 in this week.

I think I will keep my meal plan this week as close to last weeks as possible, just for ease as well as using up some of the ingredients we didn't use this week.

I have my weigh in at 10am this morning and then a work out, so we'll see how that goes.  I think as soon as I get home this morning I will need to write a blog post just to try and get my head right. And I will have to make sure I watch the videos too.