First Bellydancing Class

I've not long gotten back from my first bellydancing class in 5 years! I had forgotten how much I enjoyed it... and how confused my feet seem to get! haha! There were a couple of tracks where I recognised the music and I had parts of the choreography running through my head, and it made me smile.

As much fun as it was, it made me realise a couple things; I can't look at myself in the mirror. I think I was the biggest girl in the room, and I just couldn't look at myself... I was so embarrassed. I can't believe I actually look like that. We don't have any full length mirrors at home, so it's been a while since I have really looked at myself. I also came to realise how awkward I am around people now... I feel so self conscious and I feel like everyone is staring at me and judging me. I spent most of the class avoiding looking at myself and wringing/holding my hands - something I do when I am nervous or anxious.

The thing that I think is quite odd about me, is that these kinds of things don't usually spur me on or encourage me to lose the weight.  It makes me feel like things are hopeless and that I shouldn't even bother trying. I am really grateful that I have realised this tonight as I have been able to turn it around and I can look at it as a way to make things better as not only am I exercising and doing something that makes me happy, but I am also getting out of my comfort zone and being around other people.

I also realised on the way home that I really think that bellydancing will help with getting my self confidence back. I also came across this on facebook tonight, and I wanted to share (plus I love Drew).

Week 6 Weigh In

So I've just had my week 6 weigh in, although let's be honest, I haven't been sticking to it for 6 weeks.

However, after having the heart to heart with the owner at the gym and doing the hypnosis at night, it looks like something must have clicked because I had a 1.8kg loss this week!! Crazy!!! So I am now sitting at 110kg exactly.

I honestly didn't think that I would have a loss, let alone such a large one!!!

Friday was the worst day last week for eating as I'd had a terrible afternoon which ended in comfort eating.  This along with it being Valentines day meant that it wasn't so great eating wise.

I realised today that I still haven't taken a 'before' photo... I really need to do that!!

Another thing I haven't mentioned yet, and that is that I have signed up to do belly dancing again! My first class is tonight.  I am a little nervous about it all, but it will be good to do it again, I've missed it!

Week 2 Weigh In

As I mentioned in my post this morning, Week 2 didn't go so well. But I put my big girl knickers on and went to Curves this morning for my weekly weigh in and workout.

It was really good to sit down with my coach and talk through last week, the highs and the lows.  She was able to give me some suggestions on things to do.

So, as predicted, I did gain... almost everything I lost. So I am currently sitting at 109.5kg, but looking at the positive side, it's still 200g less than my original weight. and I spose a loss is a loss and heading in the right direction.

After my workout I headed to the other side of Canberra for my doctors visit. She is really happy with my progress since I was diagnosed with anxiety and we have decided that I will go back in a couple of months to see how everything is going and to see about the possibility of starting to lower my anti depressant dosage. I don't want to rush it, but I do want to be drug free again.

I also got my grocery shopping done, so hopefully I will be able to stick to the plan this week. I am just about to put the plan on my fridge so that I can see it all the time.

Week 2 in Review... and my Week 1 weigh in

I have been meaning to write this post all week, and maybe if I had the week would have gone better...

Overall it wasn't a bad week, but due to the heat and having a five year old underfoot all week, it really didn't go as planned and I'm pretty sure I will have gained weight this week.

I think it really started after my weigh in last week.  The problem is, my scales are much kinder and I was a little disappointed that my weigh in wasn't as good, especially for a first week weigh in.  In saying that I lost 1.1kg so it's nothing to sneer at, but because I was expecting a 2kg loss, I was disappointed.

I think because of this disappointment I became quite lax in my eating habits, but also in my mindset.  I didn't print out my plan or watch my Curves videos.  Looking back I think having my weekly plan on the fridge makes a big difference as it is a constant reminder.

Foodwise, there was chocolate... not blocks, but there was chocolate... and I found that as soon as I had some, I wanted more each day. Because we were in over 40 degree heat, all I wanted was quick and easy food... which meant we had pizza a couple of times this week too... which definitely didn't help.  Plus there was a date night last night (bowling) where we had hot dogs and chips, so over all I think this week can be counted as a bit of a fail.

I also missed a work out due to a weird work schedule, so I only got 2 in this week.

I think I will keep my meal plan this week as close to last weeks as possible, just for ease as well as using up some of the ingredients we didn't use this week.

I have my weigh in at 10am this morning and then a work out, so we'll see how that goes.  I think as soon as I get home this morning I will need to write a blog post just to try and get my head right. And I will have to make sure I watch the videos too.

Halfway through the first week

It's been a few days since I have updated, mostly because I didn't want to come on here and repeat myself or tell you all about the food I have been eating.

So, I am now halfway through my first week, and I have been doing really well!! I am really happy with how I have gone.  The first 2 days were hard with wanting chocolate, but now I am doing much better. Yes, I still kinda want it, but not to the same extent.  I am hoping in another week or so I will get to the point where I can take it or leave it.

Eating-wise I have stuck to my plan with the exception of coffee... I know I should count it, but right now I just don't want to restrict myself too much. As long as I am not going overboard, at the moment I am happy to keep those in. Might not necessarily be the "right" attitude, but I'm thinking less pressure and less stress. I thought I would really struggle with eating less, but it hasn't really been an issue. I seem to want to eat more at night (which is normal for me), so have been keeping a snack aside for that.  The only big issue I need to work around is figuring out lunches on days where I am working. I don't want to keep buying lunches, so I need to get into a routine of making my lunch the night before or something.  It's the problem with working the lunch cover.

I have been to the gym twice this week; Monday and today. I will go again tomorrow and I am supposed to go on Saturday as well... I am not sure how that will go though. When I signed up for Curves Complete I found out that they would like 4 workouts, not 3 as I had planned and expected. Now I am not quite sure where to fit in the extra workout. But I am hoping that over the next couple of weeks I will be able to figure the 4th workout into a regular spot, even if I have to wait until Nessa is back at school.

I am also supposed to be making sure I get my steps up each day. Overall I need to aim for 10,000 steps, but initially they recommend aiming for 5000 steps a day. I have had a Fitbit Flex since August last year and I have worn it everyday since then (even have a tanline going on from it!). This is what I am using to track my steps.  So far I am averaging around the 6000 mark, so not too bad really. I know that I need to do a little more to get to the 10000, but at the moment I am just keeping it simple, especially as it is only my first week! My plan with this is actually to keep everything exactly as it is until Nessa goes back to school, as we will be walking to school then, and I should be able to easily hit my goals then.

Tonight I also started looking at next weeks meal plan.  The food is increasing, as has the options, so I am just getting started again. I am trying to find things that will suit everyone in the family, that might only need to be tweaked slightly (for example, I am the only one who likes green beans, so I would make those just for me and I hate broccoli and cauliflower but B and Nessa like those.) I have already had a couple of meals that I really enjoy, so will be making those again and I have found a love of peanut butter on toast!! I actually never really liked it before, but right now it is just amazing!!